Balance for Bad Brain Days

I wanted to share some of the thoughts that show up on these days when it feels more challenging to achieve balance, so if you have the same thoughts you’ll know you’re not alone:

“Who are YOU to help people?” Shame around my past is a big one for me. I was a kid who made harmful choices as a way to cope with trauma and depression, on these days my brain likes to try to convince me I don’t belong in this life I’ve made.
“Run!” Run away from your responsibilities, your relationships, just go. Leaving it all behind feels like the best solution to make that nagging in my stomach and my heart go away.
“STOP” Please stop doing, trying, pushing to be more. I’m exhausted. Don’t you just want to relax on your couch and not speak to anyone? Isn’t that where you’ll find the “comfortable, content” life you seek?

On days like this I have to shift focus from maintaining balance to working to get through the day, or however many days my brain decides to act up.

I focus on my breath as much as I can, on the physical act of my belly rising and falling as I breathe.
I try to empathize with instead of scold that little girl who endured so much just to try to numb the chaos, and feel a little love.
I treat myself to a little more salt, sugar and caffeine, but try to steer clear of the wine.
I try to fit one purely “feel good” thing into my day (other than exercise, for some reason, I can always exercise). This week that was buying a pair of shoes I normally wouldn’t have.
I try to push myself into some sense of community, whether that be a yoga class at a studio or some texts between my husband or a friend. This week my husband got the “my brain hurts” message and a few vents after that.
I shift focus to my job, break for a few minutes for one of the tools above, and go right back to tasks. If I can get in that work focus zone, I can enjoy a sense of accomplishment, and the clock toward healing can move.

Then I sit and wait it out while I fight, focus, soothe…empathize (if I can)…fight, focus, soothe; again and again.

The worst thing I can do on bad brain days is try to fix something or “figure it out.” And the worse thing people around me can do is ask “what broke?” Because there simply isn’t an answer to that.

If you’re having a bad brain day, or week, or month, I see you. This blog is my attempt to sit with you, and alongside you, as you surf through the suffering.

We’ll work on fixes when we’re feeling better. For now, let’s just try to focus on our breath and get through this together.

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Balancing a Brain that’s Fighting Back

By Katherine Warren • April 6, 2025

Your brain will straight up lie to you. There’s no way to sugar coat that, friends, there just isn’t. But your brain also creates beautiful ideas and inventions, and well, everything you see that surrounds us. It’s the power of the AND. Your brain is the king of the “and.” The first step in finding balance is recognizing this. The second step is discerning the beautiful part of your brain from the beast. The third is not reacting to, judging or negotiating with the beastly part. It’s tough, tough work. It’s lifelong work. And even if your friends start calling you things like the “definition of balance” (a term so kindly bestowed on me by some friends recently). You’re still gonna have to work your a** off on this part for the rest of your life as you sway back and forth, in and out of balance. Does it get easier? Yes and no. The beauty of understanding the feeling of balance is that you don’t have to rely on your brain so much. You know how it feels to be in a place of solid, grounded peace, no matter what your brain is shouting you “should” or “could” be doing. The harder part is that the more you find balance, the more likely it is that you are upleveling your life. Your focus and pure presence have likely brought about more of whatever you define as a successful life--mentally, physically, or materially. That uplevel can mean those brain lies cut a little deeper, make you question every decision you make to protect your peace. If you’ve learned to sit with that pain in your belly, it might fight a little harder to make you pay attention to it. It might put up a bigger fight to try to force you to listen to those untruths. This is when you have to remind yourself, your brain will straight up lie to you. Under no circumstances should you negotiate with these thoughts. That’s where spiraling lives, that’s where lack of balance lies. Sometimes holding hard to your balanced routines will do the trick.